The Promise of Mail Order Before the Age of Amazon
As listeners are well-aware, we have a love for the absurd. The fantastical. The novel.
All of which could be found in the pages of comic books.
In the age before upscale “graphic novels,” comics were the paper-and-ink pop culture Dagwood sandwich of aspirations. Perfect bodies. Colorful costumes. High-tech gadgets. Sometimes all rolled into one amazing hero. The sense of wonder was turned up to eleven.
And the ads. God, how we loved the ads. Never were the seeds of adolescent anticipation planted in a more fertile soil. The gullible were all too happy to cough-up their hard-earned paper route and babysitting money (plus a stamp!) to hucksters of all stripes.
Stickers, patches, posters, temporary tattoos, t-shirts, radio kits, spy gadgets and air rifles. U.S. government army surplus equipment. Kits teaching the ambitious how to sell cards and gifts for prizes ranging from a slot car track to a BMX bike. Not to mention laser gun plans or an offer for a ten dollar inflatable…companion. Nothing was off limits.
But there were a few gems that rose above the others, and we felt it made the most sense to not only celebrate them, but compare them based upon the awakening needs of a young man or woman whose world is slowly becoming a bit bigger than the edges of their neighborhood.
First, the lesson of responsibility that comes with pet ownership. We tell the stories behind two well-known fun and educational novelties that occupied bookshelves in many bedrooms: ant farms and sea monkeys. A kitten or puppy may be too much for some kids to handle, but a few expiring ants or bobbing brine shrimp won’t garner attention from animal control.
Next comes the need for self improvement. This desire can come from a recognized talent worth nurturing or the simple fact that you’re tired of getting your ass kicked. Come to think of it, avoiding an ass kicking can be a talent unto itself. And there’s no better method than bulking up with Charles Atlas and his Dynamic Tension. And if you were of the more delicate and creative persuasion, Art Instruction Schools helped you make the grade in the studio rather than on the beach.
And last but not least comes the need for a bit of humor in these trying times. You may be a connoisseur of more visual gags or prefer jocularity of the sonic persuasion. Either way, we’re right there with you. And in case you aren’t aware, rubber is the medium of humor, whether in the form of a chicken or a whoopee cushion. When the opportunity presents itself, our advice is to let ‘er rip!
While these prizes may not have the same appeal to your inner pervert as x-ray specs or turn the screws on a playground enemy like trick gum, we think they’re top shelf. Go check that old shoebox in the attic or hit the web to round out your collection.
Tell us about your go-to novelty when you had a buck or two burning a hole in your pocket. You can trust us. Just don’t forget to include a self-addressed stamped envelope.